Long Drive Thinking

Alright, I lied last week. This isn’t the wake for the Racers that just died. It’s leading up to the wake. I completely forgot about my dive into Jay’s headspace. To story!
*********
“Are you okay?”

Amy glanced up from her homework, not the least surprised to see Nat and Aaron exchange worried glances at each other before focusing their attention back to her. It was her first day back at classes since the race and she wanted nothing more to avoid talking about it. Thankfully, her study buddies understood and said nothing about the race. However, they quickly picked up her rotten mood.

“No,” she said bluntly, feeling the bitterness in her mouth. “The Circuit had decided that for my little stunt this last weekend, that I can’t leave Acro City limits until after the next race.”

“Ooo,” Nat said, flinching. “That’s… not so bad…?”

Amy scowled, thinking of Tyson and what a nice time she had with him. “I have friends outside of Acro City,” she grumbled, knowing that she only had one friend she wanted to see outside the city limit. “Now I can’t see them.”

“Can’t they come visit you?” Aaron asked.

“They don’t have cars,” she muttered, thinking of the call she gave Tyson the day before and how they just talked. She had explained her punishment, hoping that the young man would take pity on her, but he told her that he couldn’t come, because he didn’t have a car to drive. Not to mention he worked a lot so… She was stuck with just calling him.

“Well,” Nat said, trying to be positive. “Look on the bright side. At least you can focus on your homework.”

“Oh, yes,” she sighed, looking down at the worksheet. “So much fun.”

“You volunteered for it,” Aaron pointed out with a chuckle. “You shouldn’t grumble.”

Amy rolled her eyes. “Whatever,” she said. “Now, are we studying for this quiz or not?”

The rest of the day at school was uneventful, filled with classes and studying with her friends. It was almost enough to help her forget her troubles, to forget the Circuit and it’s drastic hold on her life. A simple life she always dreamed of having.

However, it didn’t last long as she walked back to Maxx when her phone rang. Hoping it was Tyson, she was disappointed when she saw who it really was.

“I thought I wasn’t talking to you,” she snapped as she held the phone up to her ear.

“You aren’t,” Jay admitted. “I just thought…”

“Thought what?” she demanded to know, coming up to Maxx and sitting on his hood. He was the typical silver sports car they favored. “That a few days of letting me stew would make things better?”

Wisely, he didn’t answer that.

“I know I’m supposed to go to Hacker’s shop,” she went on, rolling her eyes. “He’s already texted me that I didn’t let him check Maxx out after the race. I’m probably going to get an earful from him when I get there.”

“Yes…” Jay said slowly. “Do… Do you want me there or…?”

“No, Jay,” she quickly said, glaring into nothing, hoping that he could feel it wherever he was. “I don’t want you there. I’d be happy to spend the rest of my life not seeing you again.”

“Amy…”

“Don’t Amy me,” she snapped. “I told you that I didn’t want to race and you made me do it anyway!”

“You’re the one who wants to go to the Final,” he quickly pointed out. “The reason why I wanted you to race earlier was so that you could get enough points so that this next race you don’t have to push yourself into the top three.”

She didn’t want to admit it, but it was a bit nice that he didn’t want her to push herself too far. However, she shook her head of the notion. The only kind person she had met this weekend was Tyson. And he was far better at it than Jay was.

“It doesn’t matter,” she grumbled. “They’re not going to let me leave the Circuit anyway.”

“Yes, you will,” Jay said sternly. “I promised to help you get there. I can’t break that promise to you.”

She hated it when he brought up his Talent. Honestly, she was glad that of all the strange Talents she could have had that she wasn’t landed with one as terrible as his.

“I want to help, Amy. I just don’t know how right now since you won’t tell me anything.”

Ooo. He was good.

“He’s right,” Maxx said quietly.

“Shut it,” she snapped at her program. “I still don’t want to see you, Jay.”

He sighed on the other end. “I’m sorry you feel that way, but the longer you avoid me, the more the rumor mill is going to churn out things neither of us want.”

“Oh?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. “And why would I care what the rumor mill is saying about us? What could they possibly get from it?”

“That I’m about to sell your contract to someone less understanding as retribution for what you did this weekend.”

Amy felt herself pale.

“Or that the Circuit is considering of pulling your contract back, give you another year before letting you race again…”

“Jay…” No, they wouldn’t do that to her. They couldn’t! She was one of the best new Racers in the Circuit. She knew how much she was worth to them.

“I’m just saying,” he said, his tone oddly cool. “There are people who think that you aren’t stable enough to be racing and a lot of those rumors are stemming from the fact that you aren’t talking to me or making any sort of appearance.”

“I have classes!”

“They don’t care. You’re acting aloof and they don’t like that.”

She gritted her teeth. That was the problem with rumors. If enough people heard them and took notice of them, then they started to believe the rumors to be true. She couldn’t afford for those rumors to become true. She wanted out of the Circuit!

“Fine,” she snapped. “What do I need to do?”

“There’s an event at the end of the week to celebrate the lives of the Racers lost during the last race. If you only show up for a few minutes I’m sure that would be enough.”

Amy wanted to vomit. Show up to a wake for Racers? The Sponsors must know how hard all this is on her. They were just trying to push her to the breaking point.

“And let me guess,” she said bitterly, submitting herself to this distasteful task. “You’ll be accompanying me?”

There was a slight pause. “It doesn’t have to be me…”

She frowned. Why had he said that so quietly? “Really?” she asked, hesitant.

“Maxx told me that you met someone,” Jay muttered. “He also said that you were smitten.”

She glared at her car. Maxx, she could tell, was ignoring her. “I don’t get smitten.”

“He didn’t know who you were,” Jay said softly. “I’m sure that was appealing.”

There was truth in that. “He can’t make it,” she muttered. “He doesn’t have a car and I can’t leave the city. Won’t be happening.”

There was another pause. “I could get him.” It almost sounded like he was dragging the words out of his mouth.

Amy sat up, nearly standing off of Maxx. “What?”

“I could get him,” Jay repeated. “I know you don’t want to be around me… so maybe if you had a friend with you, it would help.”

“You don’t have to do that,” she muttered, wishing that she wasn’t blushing. Jay and Tyson meeting? She wasn’t sure if she wanted that. “Besides, he might be working that evening…” He wasn’t. He was one of the few people who could fill the day shift at his work. Tyson almost never worked evenings.

“I’m sure he could get it off,” Jay said in a neutral tone. Amy narrowed her eyes into nothing. What was Jay up to now? She was aware that he did have feelings for her so why was he offering to go get Tyson, someone he had never met?

“Just call him later, ask if he can, and let me know,” Jay went on to say. “Honestly, it’s the least I can do after what I put you through this weekend.”

Really? She wondered. What’s your game Jay?

“Thank you,” she said instead, careful to keep her own tone neutral. “I’ll let you know. I still don’t want to see you at Hacker’s shop today.”

“Tomorrow then?”

“Fine.”

“Alright,” Jay sighed. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow.”

“Bye.”

“Bye.”

She ended the call, frowning at her phone. Sitting back down on Maxx, she went over the conversation again in her head. What was that about?

“What was that about?” Maxx asked, voicing her thoughts. A few other students were walking past and jumped when they heard the car talk. It only took them a few seconds to recognize her and walked off nodding their heads and sneaking glances back at them. She did her best to ignore them; an easier task with the confusion she was feeling.

“Why did you tell him about Tyson?” she asked instead, glancing at the windshield.

“He had a right to know,” Maxx stated. “You brushed him off when he was worried about you. And he is your Sponsor, he’s responsible for you. I think you’ve been a little harsh towards him.”

She sighed. She really hated it when her program was right.

“Maxx?”

“Yep?”

“Shut up.”
***********
If Jay weren’t driving, he would have been staring forlornly out at the scenery. A week after the race and the wake for the three Racers was today. He really had been dreading this all week, more so after Amy had called him back.

Tyson was coming.

And his Talent was triggered and he couldn’t back out of getting the young man from Wendell. He wondered what he was like, what Amy could have possibly seen in him…

Jay sighed. Maybe this wouldn’t have been so bad if Amy and this Tyson were just friends, like how she was with Hacker and Aaron, but he knew it was different this time. After he was allowed back into the shop, Amy had ignored him, instead spending her time either worried about Maxx or texting the boy. Sally had snickered that Amy was finally showing some heart and had interest in the boy. Dear, blessed Sally, generally so ignorant of any sort of emotion unless it dealt with love. If Sally called Amy out on this, what chance did he have?

It really struck him that as much as he had tried to gain Amy’s affection, she was quick to give it to someone else. Someone who didn’t know who she was or what she could be. Literally a random person off the street who had offered her a milkshake.

And the worst bit? He couldn’t bring himself to blame her for it.

She associated him with the world of the Circuit. He was her Sponsor after all, he told her what races to enter, provided her paycheck… Maxx was a product of his family’s company! Her own car came from him. She hated the races, she hated the Circuit, she hated that no one would let her pursue her dreams without her Talent. And he was lumped into it. He wondered if there was any chance that he could have separated himself from all that hate and that Amy would see him as Jay without everything else people associated with him.

He could see the appeal in that. After a lifetime of watching women who only cared for his family’s money, at first towards his father then towards him as he grew, it was a breath of fresh air to find someone who didn’t know who he was. And Amy… Even though she knew who he was, she wanted nothing to do with him. He liked that she scorned his social position, brushed off all he could offer and choose instead to shove it back in his face. It was nice. Perhaps that was why she was attracted to this Tyson, someone who didn’t recognize the famous policy-changing Racer that she was.

Taking the turn off for Wendell, he did his best to school his face. Amy liked this guy. Amy liked this guy. Though it hurt to acknowledge that Amy was fond of someone else, he would prove to be a decent man and treat this guy with respect.

He would pretend that it didn’t hurt.

Just like when he told his father that he was picking up Amy’s date for her. Jay’s cheek twitched at the memory. His father was smug about it. Smug! He knew why his father reacted like that. Ford didn’t want his son to be associated with another Talented, one who had quickly taken the spot light. Jay wanted so much to just brush it off, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that his father was right.

He had spent his entire life hiding his Talent, a difficult task at times, but he knew what to do. Don’t make promises that are spelled out in black and white, make sure there is grey area. Grey area didn’t trigger his Talent. Don’t make promises that contradict each other; that lead to pain. Be careful of the promises he did make, small ones so that no one would notice that they were being forced to keep up their side. But most importantly, don’t bring attention to himself.

Despite being the son of a powerful businessman, Jay always made sure that he didn’t do anything too scandalous, too dangerous, or too outrageous. Unlike other company’s heirs, the media thought him to be a decent man with good morals and great business skills. That was how he wanted them to see him; he didn’t want them to know he was an Oath Maker…

And his father was right. Being with Amy, a Talented who was almost always in the news for her behavior, would bring attention to him. The media and businessmen would start looking closer at his past, trying to pick apart the lies he had so carefully laid to hide his secret. If they found out… He shook his head. Amy was also right. Being Talentless was better.

He hated to admit it, but… It was a good thing that Amy was showing interest in someone else, someone with no secrets, with no dreaded Talent that people would fear and try to destroy, with no idea just how dangerous the world of the Talented could be. The media could latch onto Tyson, Amy’s new… Boyfriend?

It made Jay sick even thinking about it. He was using Tyson as an escape goat to hide his Talent but at the price of loosing a young woman he was slowly growing to love.

It really did make him sick.

He parked on the street of the address that Amy had given him. He sat there for a moment, collecting his thoughts, shoving his emotions down, and schooling his face to pleasant. He hated this. He hated all of it and wished that he, too, was Talentless.

Taking a deep breath, he got out of the car and approached the appropriate door. The building was a four apartment complex, with Tyson’s address being one of the ground apartments. He knocked on the door, a bit surprised when he heard a child screaming. Still schooling his features to pleasant, he smiled as the door opened and a haggard looking young mother with the screaming infant in her arms answered.

If Tyson was married and hitting on Amy, the boy was going to be in a world of hurt.

“Is Tyson here?” he asked.

“Yep, just got back from work. I think he’s changing,” the woman sighed, rolling her eyes. She turned her back on him and shouted into the apartment. “Hey, little brother! Your ride is here.”

Little brother? Darn it. He was living with his sister.

“Coming! I’ll be out in a minute!”

The woman rolled her eyes again. “Come on in,” she grumbled, opening the door wide enough for him to slip in. “He’s going to take a minute or two.”

“Thanks,” Jay said, feeling awkward as he stood beside the door, glancing around the apartment. In all honesty, this was the first time he had been in an apartment that wasn’t spotlessly clean and well cared for. Then again, all the apartments he had been to usually belonged to single, rich heirs that wanted out of their parents’ homes and live on their own. Those apartments were generally high end and used to host parties. This apartment looked lived in, with papers piling over tables, couches covered in pillows and blankets, and toys littered across the floor.

“So…” the mother said, eyeing him. Jay ignored that; he was used to people looking at him. “A funeral?”

“A wake,” he corrected. “Amy would have come herself…”

“But she was punished for leaving without permission,” the woman finished for him. “I know. I’m on top of all the Circuit news.”

“And your brother isn’t?”

“He wasn’t until he met Racer Aims,” she laughed. “I’ve never seen my little brother so smitten by someone. It would figure that the first woman he takes a liking to is a famous Racer and he didn’t even know it.”

Jay shared a weak chuckle. “Sometimes that is very attractive.”

“Speak from experience? You’re… Aims’s Sponsor, right?”

He shrugged. “If I weren’t, she wouldn’t associate with me.”

Before she could reply, Tyson came into the living room. Jay gave him a quick glance, still not knowing what Amy saw in that. A younger man with slightly chubby cheeks and short black hair. At least he knew how to dress, picking nice slacks and a pressed button shirt to wear, similar to what Jay himself wore. However, he could tell that Tyson’s clothes were far less expensive as his own and it showed with the slight rumbled look the clothes took when compared with his.

“You must be Jay, Amy’s Sponsor,” Tyson said, walking up to him and holding out his hand. “I’m Tyson.”

“Nice to meet you,” Jay said as he shook the young man’s hand, hating how the words tasted in his mouth. “We should probably be going if we don’t want to be late.”

“Right,” Tyson agreed. He turned to his sister. “I’ll see you later tonight.”

“Don’t be out too late,” his sister warned. “You open tomorrow.”

“Right,” Tyson sighed. “Bye.”

“See you later.”

Jay walked out first, wishing that he wasn’t doing this. Why did he agree to give Tyson a ride? Why couldn’t he have said that he would send someone else to pick him up? He had plenty of underlings who could. Why did he agree to do this?

Oh, that’s right. He wanted to meet the guy who managed to grab Amy’s attention out from under him.

“So,” Tyson said as they reached his car. Jay unlocked it and motioned for the young man to get in. “Thanks, I guess, for giving me a ride. I know it’s probably awkward for you to do this. I mean… You are a high end businessman picking up one of your underling’s date…” He paused, groaning as he shut the door. “That came out wrong.”

Wrong, yes. But you’re also right, Jay thought bitterly.

“I owe Amy,” Jay said with a shrug as he buckled in and turned the car on. “I owe her a lot. Besides, it’s nice to break away from all the hassle of the city and enjoy a ride.” Not that he enjoyed the ride here. He had been dreading it all day and his thoughts while coming weren’t any comfort either.

“Acro City is a busy place,” Tyson agreed. “Wendell is a slower pace kind of place and that’s fine. I kind of prefer it actually.”

That’s nice, Jay thought, trying hard not to speed as he drove back to the city. He could already tell that Tyson was actually a nice guy, a bit nervous but that was alright. Jay started to see what Amy liked about him. He suppressed a sigh.

This was going to be a long drive.
*******
Personally, I love long drives, except when I’m worrying about something. I’ve been in Jay’s place one too many times of being on the road with nothing but my own thoughts to haunt me. It’s… unpleasant. Also, I’m starting to feel more sorry for Jay than for Amy. That, however, will change. Probably sooner rather than later…

Next time: the wake. Really. The next post will be the wake.

Enjoy the journey!

Tyson and Milkshakes

Brief reminder: The racing scoring system has changed. She needs points, not wins. Anyway, time to meet Tyson. I honestly hate reading love-triangles, so why do I keep writing them? To the story!
********
“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“Are you sure? I’m a great listener and I am stuck with you…”

“Maxx.”

“Yes?”

“Shut up.”

Maxx fell silent, allowing her thoughts fall silent as well. She wasn’t sure where she had ended up. She just drove after the race. Drove and drove and drove. Anyplace was better than that track, watching as the debris smoldered on the water. She brought her knees up to her face, burying her eyes in her knees. She sat on some curb, beside some park, but she didn’t know where. She had never been to this far outside of Acro City on her own before. It was one of the smaller towns that surrounded the larger city, leaches to the city’s systems but far enough away to be away from it. Once she had seen this small half blocked sized children’s park, she stopped Maxx, got off him, and sat promptly down on the curb.

And that’s where she stayed, the cool air telling her that evening was fast approaching. Not that she cared. She couldn’t care. It was too much. All of it.

She should have never gotten out of bed today.

She tried to press it all out. All the memories, all the worries, all the confusion. Everything. She just wanted it gone. All she wanted was to be left alone and never have to worry about using her Talent ever again. It has caused her nothing but grief all her life. It would just be better if she were born Talentless. That was all she ever wanted….

Amy wasn’t sure when she started crying again, but the tears on her cheeks went cold as the cool air brushed across them.

Jay’s probably worried sick at this point, she started to think as the sun was setting. But she couldn’t even bring herself to think of her Sponsor. He wasn’t here, probably got stuck having to explain to the media why she had run off like that. It was one of the few times she was glad that she had Jay around; he could handle that stuff much better than she ever could. That was his world, what he had grown up doing.

It was where he belonged.

And all she wanted was to disappear.

“Excuse me? Miss? Are you alright?”

Amy glanced up, half expecting it to be Jay. He always came after her when she was upset. But this wasn’t Jay. It was another young man, probably close to her age. He had stopped in front of her, straddling his pedal bike between his legs. He wore a fast food uniform and the beak of his hat jutted out from underneath his bike helmet.

“No,” she answered him, hiding her face again in her knees. “Leave me alone.”

“Hey,” the boy said in a kind tone. She heard him kick the kickstand out and propped his bike up. She didn’t acknowledge him as he sat down beside her. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she snapped at him, refusing to look at him. “Just leave me alone.”

“You don’t look like you need to be alone,” he said, nudging her shoulder with his. “Come on. Tell me.”

“It’s none of your business, insistent person I’ve never met.”

He chuckled. “My name is Tyson. Now I’m not a stranger.”

She snorted, still refusing to look up.

“What’s your name?”

He didn’t give up easily, she had to give him that.

“Amy,” she finally grumbled.

“Amy,” he repeated, sounding like he was nodding to himself. “You’re upset about something? Did you loose your race or something?”

This had her shooting him a glare. He had taken off both his bike helmet and his hat, revealing his face. It was a kind face with still a bit of baby fat clinging to his cheeks. Freckles were sprinkled under his bright blue eyes and his black hair was chopped short.

“What?” he asked, flinching a bit at her harsh gaze. “You’re wearing a jumpsuit, I assumed…”

“Are you late for work?” she asked, eyeing his own uniform. It had a few grease spots she was sure that the wash couldn’t take out and slightly rumpled. Typical fast food uniform. She has worn one the summer before her senior year and vowed to never work in a fast food restaurant ever again.

“Just getting off, actually,” he said with a shrug. “I was just passing by when I saw a pretty girl crying on the curb and thought that I could help.”

She snorted. Pretty? Her? Was he blind? “Thanks for the offer,” she said bitterly, planting her face down again. “But there isn’t anything you can do.” There’s nothing that anyone can do… she thought bitterly.

“There must be something,” Tyson insisted. “A shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, a milkshake to drown your sorrows in...”

She hated to admit it, but the milkshake offer sounded good.

“Well?” he asked.

“Milkshake sounds good,” she muttered, hoping he wouldn’t hear her.

“Great!” he said, getting to his feet. He held his hand out to her. “I know the right place to go. Best milkshakes made in all of Wendell.”

“Wendell?” she asked, glancing up at him and ignoring his hand as she got up. “Is that where I am?” It was a smaller town just north of Acro City by a half hour drive. She was surprised that was as far as she got.

“You didn’t even know where you were?” he asked, sounding surprised. His look turned serious. “Are you running or did someone drop you off here…?”

“A bit of running,” she admitted. “Not that I got very far and not like that I’m not going to be back there. I have a curfew to make before they start sending people out to find me.”

“Who would be looking for you?” he asked, finally sounding nervous.

“Oh, come on,” she snapped, gesturing to her jumpsuit. “I’m a Racer! I thought that this would give me away!”

“No way!” he breathed, taking in again her outfit with wide shocked eyes. “You’re a Racer? Seriously?”

“Ugh,” she groaned, rolling her eyes. “I’m leaving.”

“No, wait!” he said, grabbing her arm. “I’m sorry if I didn’t recognize you… I really don’t follow the Circuit. I’ve just been never interested in that sort of stuff, you know?”

Amy blinked. After everything that had happened that day, hearing that someone else in this crazy world didn’t follow the races was like a breath of fresh air. “Seriously?” she asked, still staring at him as if she had never seen the likes of him before. She hadn’t really. Nearly everyone followed the Circuit. “You never follow?”

“I probably disgust you with that, didn’t I?” he asked nervously.

Amy quickly shook her head. “Actually, it’s great. I am so sick of the Circuit and the fame it’s brought me. It’s nice to hear that someone actually didn’t know who I was at first sight.”

Tyson smiled and Amy decided that she liked it. It stripped the baby fat from his face and lit up his eyes. “That’s great!” he said. “I mean… I’m glad that you can appreciate that. I always figured that Talented always got upset when a Talentless didn’t recognize them.”

“Oh, most of them are,” she agreed bitterly. “But I’m not like that. I’d much rather be Talentless myself.”

“Really?” he asked, sounding surprised. “How about we talk about that over a milkshake? My treat!”

“You know, Tyson,” she said, finally smiling a bit. “That sounds pretty great.”
**********
“I don’t know if this milkshake is the best in Wendell, but it is one of the better ones I’ve had in my life.”

Tyson grinned, nodding. “I knew you’d like it. Everyone likes it.”

They sat across from each other in booth by a window, sucking up the last bit of their milkshakes. Nellie Diner was a mom ‘n’ pop shop; typical fifties style with flickering lights, soft music over the speakers, and limy-green in color with pasty white strips. This particular shop also included bumper stickers from all over the world, plastered on every available wall space. It was a nice place, she admitted, a nice and cozy place that she could see herself getting used to.

She picked up her milkshake, trying to angle the straw at the bottom of the cup to get the last bit of the sweet treat. Maxx was parked outside. The program had grumbled a bit to her inside her head as she followed after Tyson to the shop, noting that she was following a complete stranger into a place she knew nothing about. She, however, ignored her program and his pouting, and he was currently giving her the silent treatment. Didn’t bother her any. The silence was what she needed most from him.

“So,” Tyson said, looking a bit nervous again. “What had you crying on the side of the road? Did you actually loose your race?”

“Not by much,” she said softly, not even glancing him in the eye. It really wasn’t any of his business- she shouldn’t even be here- but she found herself wanting to explain things to this kind boy who bought her a milkshake. He seemed like the decent sort, one that she could unburden her cares on and he would just listen. A friend with an ear and a shoulder to cry on. Not that she didn’t have that with Sally, Hacker, and to some small extent, Jay, but Tyson even admitted that he wasn’t into the Circuit. She needed someone outside of Acro City to unburden to.

“You say that like it isn’t a bad thing…?” he asked, sounding confused.

“Not really,” she said, shrugging. “It’s… It’s what happened behind me that’s got me like this.” She took a deep breath. “You might not have heard… but there was a crash. It was pretty bad…”

“Oh,” Tyson said softly. “I’m sorry.”

She closed her eyes tight, hoping the action would block the memory from coming to the front of her mind. “It’s hard seeing crashes like that… My dad..” She took in a deep shivering breath. “My dad died in a crash like that.”

Tyson reached over the table to grasp her hand. “I’m sorry,” he said again. She glanced up to see the pity in his expression. “That must have been terrible.”

She wasn’t sure if he meant her dad dying or watching others die in a similar crash. However, she found that she didn’t care which one he was pitying. At least he was trying to understand. That was much better than what anyone else had tried to do.

“Worse bit?” she went on softly, not pulling her hand from his grasp. “I could have avoided racing today. But no! My Sponsor wanted me to race today.” She snorted, her other hand forming a fist. She really wished Jay was here right now. She’d punch him. “He said that it would be good for me to race today, show them what I’ve got.”

“He doesn’t sound like the kind of guy who you should be hanging out with,” Tyson pointed out, his tone strangely… protective? “If he doesn’t listen to what you say, then he isn’t worth it.”

“He’s my Sponsor,” she grumbled, rolling her eyes. “There’s not much I can do to get rid of him. He pays my bills, deals with the media for me… Heck, he even got me all my school books this semester. I was not expecting that.”

Tyson frowned; Amy decided she liked this expression on his face too. The baby fat came in and it looked more like a pout. It was cute. “You go to school?”

She nodded. “I don’t want to be in the Circuit forever. Once I’m done with my five years racing, I’m going to do what I want to do.”

“What’s that?”

“Chemistry,” she admitted. “I want to make medicines.”

“A worthy goal,” he laughed, that cute smile coming out again. “I’m working full time right now to get enough money to start college.”

“Oh?” she asked, suddenly very interested in him. “What are you going into?”

“Horticulture,” he laughed nervously. “Not as glitzy as some careers, but I’d like to think that if I get in it, that I might help find a way to end world hunger, you know? Figure out more durable plants for third world countries, teach them how to use the resources they have and what they can really do with it…” He laughed again, turning his head away as if he were ashamed. “It’s silly, I know, but…”

“No,” she said, turning her hand over so she could squeeze his hand. “That sounds like a worthy goal too. I never thought about how much horticulture could make a difference in the world.”

Tyson looked up with that smile again. “Really?”

“How much longer are you going to wait until you start school?” she asked.

“Another year or so,” he sighed. “As I said, I’m trying to save up my money for college. I didn’t get good enough grades to get one of those all-paid-tuition scholarships, so between what I make and what small scholarships I’ve got, it’s going to be a bit before I get into school.”

Amy grimaced a bit. It probably wouldn’t be best to tell him that before she was a Racer she had earned one of those all-paid-tuition scholarships. She had been amazed when she got it and was grinning until the Circuit dragged her away. She had worked hard for that scholarship, knowing just how many other Talentless also worked to get above the rest. There were too many losers in the cutthroat world of scholarships.

Btz, btz, btz.

“Oh,” she said, fumbling for her phone. “That’s mine.”

She gave him a quick apologizing smile as she pull her hand away from his to answer it. “Hello?”

“Where are you?”

“Nice to talk to you too, Jay,” she grumbled. Great. Just great. Just as she was starting to feel better about life, worrying about someone else for a change, her Sponsor had to go and ruin the moment. The next time she saw him, he was getting punch in the face.

“I’m serious, Amy,” Jay said, sounding exhausted through the phone. “The media is in a frenzy since you aren’t here.”

“Tell them to take a hike,” she snapped. “I am not some sort of circus freak they paid to see.” Tyson frowned at that, glaring briefly at the phone at her ear.

“Amy,” Jay said sternly.

“No, Jay,” she growled. “I’m not going to deal with them.”

“Fine,” he snapped back. It must be going bad there. Jay never snapped at her. It made her wonder what was really happening back in Acro City. “But at least tell me that you’re safe so I can assure them that you haven’t gone off and killed yourself.”

“The rumors are that bad, huh?” she asked, slightly amused. While killing herself was an issue completely off the table, disappearing had an appeal.

“People are getting worried,” Jay said through what sounded like his teeth.

“Which means you, Sally, Hacker, and my mom,” she translated. She eyed Tyson again, noting his confusion and glaring. He obviously didn’t like what he was hearing from her side. “Hey, Jay, could we talk later? I have a friend that I’m talking to.”

“Friend?” he repeated. “Where? You’re not with Nat and Aaron, and Sally and Hacker are with me… Who else do you talk to in this city?”

“What makes you think I’m in the city?”

The other end was silent.

“I’ll be back before the curfew,” she promised him. “Then you can give me an earful. But until then… Don’t call me again.”

“Amy…” She pulled the phone away from her ear and thumbed the end button, effectively cutting her Sponsor off. “Sorry about that,” she said to Tyson, putting her phone back down. “My Sponsor is a jerk.”

“That was your Sponsor?” Tyson asked, once again glaring at the phone.

“Yep,” she mumbled. “He’s getting punched later.” She then sighed, noting the time on her phone. “And I promised that I would be back before the Circuit curfew. I should probably get going.” She stood up. Tyson quickly followed her example, walking her to the door. “Thanks for the milkshake, Tyson. And the listening ear. I needed it.”

“Any time,” Tyson said cheerfully, quickly making the mood lighter. She kind of liked that, how quickly he could make things seem better. “If you ever need another milkshake…”

Amy wasn’t sure, but she thought that Tyson was trying to hit on her. She was used to Jay’s constant flirting, with bold and confident moves and words, but Tyson’s nervous and soft approach was enduring.

“Yeah,” she agreed, smiling. “How about we exchange numbers? That way I can call you up if I need another one.”

“Sure!” Tyson said quickly, fumbling around his uniform to get his phone out. “That sounds great!” The phone exchange took only a moment and they were standing awkwardly again.

“So,” Amy said, unsure what to do next. “See you around?”

“Of course!” Tyson said, grinning and also fidgeting. “I hope it won’t be long before you need another milkshake…” He then flinched. “That came out wrong. Not that I don’t want to share a milkshake with you… Wrong again… I’d just like to see you again… without the milkshake problems… Not that milkshakes are problematic… it’s just you know…” He sighed, bowing his head in defeat.

Amy grinned. This boy really didn’t know what to do around a girl.

“I’ll call you,” she promised, holding her hand out to shake. “And not just for a milkshake.”

She could really get used to his smile.
***********
Jay was waiting in the RCC’s garage as Amy finally pulled up. He checked his phone, noting that she had shown up just minutes before the curfew started. He said nothing as she pulled Maxx into his place. The program was still in his motorcycle form and was arguing with his Racer.

“They’re not going to put up with your leaving,” Maxx was warning her. “You’re going to get some punishment for that stunt.”

He couldn’t be more right. Jay groaned softly, pinching the bridge of his nose. He could feel the headache already pounding away inside his skull. It had been a long day. After his dramatic conversation with his father, he had to deal with the media. Of course they wanted to know about Amy’s father and why she reacted the way she did. He did his best to appease them and give them enough answers that they wouldn’t bother her longer, but then the other Sponsors had to start their digging in. Though they used teasing tones, he knew what the undercurrent of their words were. They didn’t think that he had a good enough hold on his Racer, to reign her in like they would have done. They would have forced her to confront the media, to deal with their unsympathetic questions and deal with living that crash over and over again.

He couldn’t do that to Amy. She’s been through enough.

But even after he dealt with all of that, he had to deal with Camellia. The woman was absolutely livid that one of her Racers wasn’t accounted for and demanded that he use the tracking code in Maxx to find her. Jay put his foot down then. The Circuit controlled enough of her life. He wouldn’t have them know everything, even if that meant not knowing where she was. Eventually, he called her, hoping that she would at least pick up.

And she did. And she said she was with a friend. A friend that wasn’t Sally, Hacker, Nat, Aaron, or him, the only people he was sure that she knew in Acro City well enough to crash with.

But no! She wasn’t even in Acro City! He quickly called her mom after that, and after assuring the woman that her daughter was safe, wondered if Amy might have been with her.

That conversation went down hill fast. Jay now had even more reason to keep Amy safe. Because if he didn’t, her mom would be coming after him. And they say dads are the protective ones when it comes to daughters.

Amy took her helmet off, her hair a mess after being under it. Jay also noted that she hadn’t changed out of her jumpsuit. Before the race, it was stunning on her, now it looked rumbled and worse for wear.

“What can they punish me with?” Amy asked Maxx, placing the helmet down on his seat. “An earlier curfew?”

“Something a bit worse than that,” Jay said, standing up and stretching the stiff muscles of his lower back. Amy jumped at the sound of his voice and spun around on him.

“What are you doing here?” she snapped. He raised an eyebrow.

“You promised that I could give you an earful when you got back,” he pointed out. “My Talent has kept me here to fulfill it.”

“Oh…” Amy said sheepishly, glancing away. “Sorry. I’ll word it better next time.”

“There won’t be a next time,” Jay groaned. “Your punishment isn’t a curfew, it’s a boundary.”

“Boundary?” she repeated.

He nodded solemnly. “And believe me, it could have been a lot worse if I wasn’t there to argue your side. I know you were upset, but you shouldn’t have run off like that.”

“Oh, really?” she snapped. Jay flinched, hearing the tears in her voice. “Everyone is just going to expect me to happily talk about Racers dying in the same kind of race my dad died in? That I should be grateful that I wasn’t in it so I could advance? What else was I going to do, Jay? I can’t face them. Can’t! They’ve already destroyed my life enough! They don’t need to give me mental warfare too!”

Jay flinched. She was right, he hated to admit it, but she was right. The Circuit and Sponsors had no right to play these mind games with her. She already knew that they wanted to kill her, wasn’t that enough?

“I’m sorry,” he said softly, watching as she slumped away from him. “I’m trying what I can…”

“Really?” she snapped, spinning around to him again. She pointed an accusing finger at him. “Who was it that wanted me to race today? Who insisted that it was to show them that I wouldn’t play by their rules? What’s that got me? Nothing! Heck, more of my rights have been invoked. Now I have a boundary that I’m supposed to follow!”

Jay found himself stepping back, surprised by just how mad she was. “Don’t take this out on me!” he found himself snapping back. “I tried to get them to leave you alone! If they had it their way, you would have been expelled from school! But I stood up for you, told them that you had problems with that crash. Which, I might point out, you do! I’m trying to help you Amy, then why can’t you help me back?”

“Are you…” She narrowed her eyes, glaring. “Are you bringing up that I wouldn’t sneak into hospital records for you?”

Jay flinched. “No!” he said too quickly.

“Leave me alone!” she yelled. “I don’t want anything to do with you!”

“Amy!”

He grabbed her arm, hoping the action would at least make her stay long enough so he could explain himself. However, she spun around with her fist, knocking him in the jaw. He stumbled back, holding his jaw careful; he should know by now that she has a mean right hook.

“I don’t want to talk to you,” she sneered, yanking her arm free. “Just leave me alone.” She stomped off, finally managing to get away from him.

Rubbing his jaw, Jay watched her leave, truly confused. What was the matter with her? She had been gone for hours; she should have cooled down by now. He moved his jaw to make sure that it still worked as he came up beside Maxx.

“Hey,” he said, sitting down next to the motorcycle. “Care to explain what just happened?”

“You pushed where you shouldn’t?” Maxx suggested.

He shot a glare at the bike. “Really? I know I said something wrong, but I wasn’t expecting that strong of a reaction. What happened when you two left?”

“You honestly want to know?” Maxx asked. Slowly, Jay nodded.

“Yes. I think I do.”

“You’re not going to like it.”

Jay rolled his eyes. “Just another thing on top of my growing problems. What happened? Did Amy run into a guy who gave her a listening ear?”

“Yes.”

Jay jumped, staring at Maxx. The front tire turned to him; if the program wasn’t a piece of machinery, he would have sworn he was getting the stink eye.

“We made it all the way to Wendell,” Maxx explained. “She sat down on a curb and sat crying for a couple of hours before a nice young man came up to her and offered to get her a milkshake and to listen.” Maxx paused. “I think she was kind of smitten by the boy.”

Jay stiffened. What? No. No, this couldn’t be happening. Yes, he knew that Amy didn’t like him, but they’ve been slowly becoming friends with a common enemy. And from the last few weeks, he thought that he was making a slow progress away from ‘friend’ to something a bit more than that. He couldn’t have heard the program right.

“How could she become smitten over a milkshake?” he asked, trying to wrap his head around it. Amy pushed almost everyone away, even other young men who tried to win her favor. She was adamant that she didn’t want any sort of romantic relationships.

“Well,” Maxx mussed, “it might have to deal with the fact that he didn’t know who she was. Apparently he doesn’t follow the races. I guess she thought it was nice to find someone who didn’t know who she was and could have a normal conversation that didn’t revolve around the Circuit.”

“Maxx, if you’re pulling my leg, I’m going to have Hacker give you cheaper oil…” Jay threatened.

“I’m not pulling your leg,” Maxx quickly assured him. “The guy’s name is Tyson. She exchanged numbers with him.”

Jay paled. No. No. No, no, no, no. This couldn’t be happening. He had been trying so hard to get Amy to start seeing him as something other than a friend, then someone suddenly showed up and usurped his place.

Without a word, he stood up and stalked off, more angry at his father for holding him back, not letting him to go after his Racer. If he had gone after her, she would have never had met this Tyson.

But he was more angry at himself, for not having the courage to go after her and leaving the world of the Circuit behind them for just a few hours.
***********
Fun info time. Yes, I do drown my sorrows in milkshakes because I love milkshakes and I collect bumper stickers from everywhere I go. Nellie’s Diner would be a dream workplace.

But now you’ve met Tyson. One of the other problems I had earlier was that the Sponsors were trying to kill Amy off too soon (they’ll eventually get that desperate, but not yet), so I had to create a conflict that would cool the Sponsors down. And that came in the form of Tyson and the new love-triangle. Honestly, I hate love-triangles, can’t stand them in books or movies (another reason to seriously dislike Twilight), but I can’t seem to stop writing them. Ugh!

Next time on Racer: A wake for the Racers lost. Sad day.

Enjoy the journey!

Breaking Point

Forewarn: This next section was rewritten so it doesn't transition smoothly from the last post and might seem like my writing style shifted a bit. It did. Hope you like the change.
*********
Amy stared up at the ceiling of her room, stretched out under the covers. It wasn’t the most interesting ceiling she had ever seen; it was nowhere near the funny posters the dentist put up on his ceiling and only half as interesting as the ceiling in some of her classes, but she still stared at the bland white spackled ceiling. The alarm clock on her bedside had gone off a few times now, each time receiving a hit from her and earning her just ten minutes more.

Ten minutes more. She wished the world would grant her that.

Or maybe just to skip this day all together. That would be good. In fact, that would be excellent. Anything would be better than having to deal with the real world this day. Sighing, she closed her eyes, trying to push the thoughts out of her head. She had to do this. Jay had given her no choice in the matter; even after making things up with him, she still argued about going through with this race. No matter what she tried to tell him, arguing about studying for classes, or that she wasn’t feeling well, or that she and Maxx needed to at least take one Race off, he wouldn’t put up with it. He even brought up her contract, citing that she had promised that her classes would not interfere with the Races and that she was a Speeder. She didn’t get sick like the rest of them. And Maxx was fine. Hacker made sure of that.

But his most adamant point was that she needed to be seen at this race.

Groaning, she rolled onto her side, gripping her pillow in a death grip. No. She couldn’t do this. Jay had to know that. She couldn’t do this race.

Unbidden came the powerful memory of sitting in front of the television, watching her dad race, fighting to win the right to return home, only to blow apart in front of millions.

“They picked this type of race to physic you out,” Jay had pointed out to her. “You’ve got to show these people that you won’t be pushed around by their games. You’ve got to rise above it and shove in their faces that they cannot own you.”

“Easy for him to say,” she muttered under her breath, willing her face into her pillow. Maybe if she didn’t get up, they wouldn’t make her race. It was a tempting idea, and one she wished she could carry out, but it wasn’t going to happen. As much as she would hate to admit it, Jay was right. If she was going to show the Sponsors that they couldn’t scare her off, then she had to race today.

Water jet skies weren’t too terrible to handle. She had been on a few during her high school days before anyone knew about her Talent and she handled those just fine… but this was different. Although she knew that Maxx was her program now, through and through, she couldn’t help but worry that the Sponsors would try to knock her off during this Race. Poetic irony, father and daughter dying during the same type of race, doomed to never achieve their goals of living outside the Circuit. She shuttered. It was a stunt that she knew the news media would eat up. They would be all over it, trying to get the dig in every little detail of her and her father’s lives, digging into mom’s life…. Hacker would be under suspicion, Sally would be a mess, Jay…

She didn’t even want to think about her annoying Sponsor and the crush she suspected he had on her.

All in all, she just wished that Jay would let her skip this race. She had enough points. All she had to do was win one more race to get into the Race Circuit Final. It wouldn’t be that hard. She had risen so far in the little time she had been in the Circuit that would be a surprise if she didn’t get into the Final.

But Jay’s argument whirled in her head. She had to show the Sponsors that they didn’t own her…. They didn’t own her… They didn’t own her…

But they did….

Amy sobbed, curling into a ball in her bed. That was perhaps the worst thing about this. Race or not, the Circuit still owned her. She lived in the RCC, Maxx was technically their property implanted in her head, all her income came from them… Even her college tuition came from them. If the Sponsors decided that it was too much to send her to school, they could make her drop without getting her say in it.

It was the worst.

That’s it, she thought, burrowing under her covers, I am not getting up.

Once she had turned her alarm off, she settled deep in her bed, hoping that everyone would just stay clear of her and her bout of self-pity.

That was dashed about five minutes later when there was a knock at her door.

“Go away!” she yelled, turning so her back was to the door. “I’m not feeling well!”

“Aims,” said a stern voice, one that she knew well enough to answer. However, she couldn’t bring herself to answer Jay. She didn’t want to do this. He knew that. Why was he making this such an issue for her?

She heard the door open then close softly, though she still refused to turn around. There was no way that Jay was getting her out of bed. They would need a herd of rhinos to drag her out of bed.

“Amy?” Jay said softly, coming to her side and sitting on the foot of her bed. “You alright? It’s time to get ready for the race.”

“I’m not going,” she said stubbornly.

He sighed, a sound that was more exasperated than annoyed. “We’ve been over this,” he said, patting her foot. She quickly moved it out of the way, not wanting to be touched. “You need to show a strong front, prove to the Sponsors…”

“Prove what?” Amy snapped, turning her head enough to glare at him over her hunched shoulders. “They already own me. I’m little more than an entertainment slave in their eyes… A gladiator in the form of racing. What difference does it make if I show up for this race or not?”

Jay blinked at her, obviously surprised by her sudden outburst. Snorting, she turned her face back into her pillow, hoping that if she hid her face that he would go away.

“It makes all the difference,” he said softly, his tone more caring than she liked. “Yes, perhaps they control a lot of your life, but you can show them that you won’t play by their rules.”

Amy scowled. Why did he have to make sense?

“Come on,” he said, patting her foot again. “Let’s get up and go to the track. Maxx is waiting outside for us.”

“You want to go together to it?” she asked, glaring at him again. “Aren’t you supposed to be with the Sponsors?”

He shrugged. “You’re the only Racer that hasn’t checked in yet. I thought it would be wise as your Sponsor to make sure that you didn’t chicken out. No one will think of it.”

Yeah, right, she thought scowling. She thought about Camellia, about her warning about getting too close to her Sponsor. While it wasn’t uncommon for Sponsors to get involved with their Racers on a more than business level, she knew she didn’t want a part of it. Camellia was right about it. She did not want to get involved with any rumors that might suggest she and Jay had anything more than a strictly professional status.

“Fine,” she grumbled, burying her face in her pillow once more. “I’ll get up. Leave so I can change.”

Jay chuckled. “There’s my fierce Racer.” He got up and left, giving her a few more moments to hate the idea. He was right. The Sponsors might have a hold on her, a powerful hold that she couldn’t seem to break, but she didn’t have to live by their rules. She just had to show them that.

She hated it when Jay was right.
**********
Jay leaned against the wall besides Amy’s door, waiting for her to change. For what felt like the millionth time, he checked his watch, noting that they still had plenty of time to get to the track. He had a feeling that Amy might change her mind first thing in the morning of this race, that she would try everything she could to weasel out of racing, but he wouldn’t let that happen. He couldn’t let that happen. If Amy truly wanted to leave the Circuit far behind her in five years, she had to prove that nothing could faze her, that the Sponsors could do nothing to change who she was.

But once again, Jay wondered just how far they could push against her before she started to break. It sobered him when he thought about it. Amy did have a braking point. He just hoped that he could help her out before she reached it.

A few minutes later, Amy stepped out of her room, wearing her Racing jumpsuit. Jay couldn’t help but eye her up and down. The suit did nothing to hide her soft curves and slim form. It didn’t hide her straight posture and confident walk. If anything, that jumpsuit showed the world who she really was; a strong powerful young woman with the drive to reach her goals.

“What?” she snapped at him, rubbing her arms as she caught him staring. He shook his head. Why did Amy have to be so beautiful? She was distracting.

“You ready?” he asked instead, focusing instead on her face. For a split second, the fear was there, along with worry. She quickly turned the emotions in, showing the world, and him, that she wasn’t happy and she didn’t care who knew.

“No,” she grumbled, trudging down the hall. “But might as well.”

Jay knew it would be better if he kept his mouth shut.

As usual, Maxx drove himself up as they left the building. For some reason, the program was not in his usual form, instead of silver sports car, he was a blue sedan that looked nothing special.

“Um,” Jay said, pointing at Maxx.

“I’m depressed,” she snapped at him, going to the driver’s side and opening the door. “Maxx is just reflecting my mood.”

“She’s been at this all morning,” Maxx said in a similar snappish mood. “Not that I blame her.” Amy slid into her car, waiting for him to do the same.

“Oh?” he asked as he got in. “I know that this race might be hard on Amy, but I didn’t think you’d pick up on it.”

Maxx snorted, still a strange sound coming from a car. “I’m a computer chip in her brain. Of course I know what she’s feeling. And I also reviewed the race that killed her dad.” Instead of a growl, the car reeved the engine. “There was no way that he should have lost that day, little alone be killed.”

“I know,” Jay said softly, glancing at Amy. “The Kill Code is what got him.”

“Enough talk,” Amy snapped, switching the gears. “Let’s just get this over with.”
*********
Amy sat on the edge of the floating platform beside Maxx, ignoring all the hubbub around her. The hanger they were in was flooded to allow the programs to change into jet skies. She didn’t acknowledge the well wishes and sneers from the other racers, focusing instead on Hacker as he checked on Maxx. It was pretty strange to not see her mechanic in his usual grubby jeans and oversized greased sweater. Instead he wore a wetsuit, goggles, and a snorkel. He had just come up from under, swam to her and jumped up to sit next to her.

“Well?” she asked, letting her feet dangle in the water. Since it was spring, she would have figured that the water would be freezing. However, it was a nice lukewarm temperature perfect for swimming. Too bad that wasn’t what she was going to do.

“Everything’s fine!” he assured her with a smile. Amy didn’t know what Sally saw in it; then again, she never knew what Sally saw in any of her previous boyfriends and wouldn’t complain that she had finally managed to pick a good one. “I’d go as far as to say that he’s in top condition.”

“Thanks to your careful care,” she said, nudging him with an elbow. “Seriously. Thank you for keeping him in great condition.”

“Doing my job,” Hacker laughed. “And it’s not too much.” He then paused, looking around nervously. Then he leaned in, his expression serious. “I like to keep my friends alive.”

Amy said nothing, only nodding stiffly.

Why did it have to be this type of race?

“Racers!” the overhead announced. “To your skies! The race is about to start!”

“Perfect,” she grumbled. Reaching over, she took her helmet and put it on. Maxx drifted to the edge of the platform to allow her to get on him without having to swim over. Around them, the other Racers were doing the same. There were fewer Racers this time, Getting this close to the Final, more and more Racers were dropping out of races, claiming that their chances of getting to the Final were over. One part of her was glad that she would be racing against more Racers.

Another part wished there were more so she could stop being the unwanted target of attention.

“Alright,” Maxx said into her ear. “Checking our sound…”

“We’re fine, Maxx,” she snapped, allowing her program to turn to life. “Let’s just get this over with.”

“Just remember what Jay said to us on our way here,” Maxx said as they joined the other Racers to the starting line. “We don’t have to win this one. Just make it across the finish line.”

“I know,” she grumbled. “I just don’t want to do this.”

Wisely, Maxx didn’t answer her.

As they lined up at the starting line, Amy forced herself to think like a winner, of beating her competition, of getting out of the Circuit to resume her life. She thought of mom back home, watching the race with the same fear that had gripped her nearly thirteen years ago.

Without any warning, the memory of that day came back in an all too real sense. But instead of her father, she felt as if she were watching herself at the starting line, ready to win a race to get home… Did he feel this fear? Did he know that the Sponsors would never let him out of the Circuit, so much so that they would rather let him die than leave?

Or did all he feel was determination to finish his last race?

Her stomach felt sick, clenching in a way that made her want to puke in her helmet. What were her father’s final thoughts?

A loud beeping noise in her ear reminded her that the race was about to start. Glancing up, she watched as the lights changed.

Red.

Was he worried?

Orange.

Was he afraid and determined?

Orange.

Did he think of her and mom?

Green.

Amy’s brain nearly shut down. What was she doing out here?

“Aims!” Maxx snapped at her returning her to the present. Around them, the other Racers were off, leaving them in behind. Amy shook her head and let instinct take over. She couldn’t think about this. No, just drive, just race, just get out of here as quickly as possible. Her mess of thoughts did nothing to help her, so she let her brain go numb, letting just the moment envelop her. The wind whistling past her helmet, the water spraying up onto them, soaking them, the rush as they started passing other Racers. All that matter was getting to the finish line. Get there and this would be over. Win this race and she could go home.

The commentator’s remarks were lost to her ears as she weaved in and out of the other Racers, leaving the end of the pack and moving swiftly through the middle. It didn’t matter what he was saying. Once she was done with this race, she was going far away where no one would come after her.

She was going to kill anyone who did.

“Amy!” Maxx shouted at her. “Listen to me! We don’t have to win this race! Calm down!”

Didn’t have to win? Ha! Win and they could go home. Back to where she really belonged, at the house with mom, curled up on the couch watching some old movie her mom enjoyed. They’d eat popcorn and candy, laughing at the movie, glad to be together. The warmth, the love… She longed to be back there, instead of here. Anything was better than here.

“Amy!”

“No Maxx,” she breathed, blinking away the tears that threatened to overcome her. The finish line was coming up and they were starting to enter the leading pack, only a handful of Racers ahead of them. “We’re going to get out of this. We have to.”

She had to. They weren’t going to take her life. Not without a fight. They were going to regret letting her in the Circuit. They were going to regret…

BANG!

The noise came from behind. Reality came crashing down as she turned around.

It was the same scene again. Black churning smoke bellowing upwards. Fire spreading across the oil slick water. Debris floating in a mockingly peaceful way. Officials rushing in to find what they could.

Dad.

She and Maxx crossed the finish line with her gaze fixed on the crash behind them. Maxx slowed down of his own accord. She was no longer able to control him. She couldn’t even control her own thoughts as she stared at the crash. No, this couldn’t be happening…

“Aims!” It was a cheerful voice, one associated with telling Racers good news. But there was no good news. A Racer could have, most probably have, died in that crash.

“No,” she whispered. “I can’t do this.” She spun Maxx around, sending him racing back to land. “Maxx! Motorcycle!” He changed beneath her as they jumped from the water to land. They touched down, driving off as people tried to call after them. She didn’t care what they thought. She finished the race. That was all that mattered. She was done playing their polite games, where she would smile about advancing, where she would lie and say that the race was easy.

She was done and needed to get away.

Let them do what they wanted. She was done.
**********
Jay would never admit it to anyone else, but this race nearly had him jumping out of the Sponsor box and rushing to Amy’s side. Not that he could get to her side. She was a Speeder. There was no chance he had of catching her. But that didn’t stop his own feelings from kicking in. He had promised to protect her, to keep her alive to survive the Circuit so she could go home.

But there was little that he could do to help her while she was out there on the water. His place was here, among the other Sponsors, hoping that he could do something with them to keep Amy alive.

“Seems your Racer has some nerves,” someone chuckled as Amy gave a split second false start. Jay forced himself to shrug, as if he didn’t care either way.

“With the way she’s been winning,” he teased, hating the flavor it left in his mouth, “she can afford to loose a few races.”

That earned him a few chuckles and less teasing. Jay kept his emotions off his face as he watched the race, wishing he could tell her to slow down. She didn’t have to win this race. All she had to do was to get over the finish line. Although he had told her this, he felt that she wasn’t listening. Good thing he had Maxx to remember it. The program was likely to be in more control right now than Amy was. He would remember to not push them. All they were trying to prove was to the Sponsors that she would not play by their rules, would not let them control every aspect of her life.

“I’m surprised she’s actually racing,” his father said as they sat side by side in the Sponsor Box. “And giving it a good shot. Probably won’t win this one outright, but she’ll advance.”

“Of course she’s racing,” Jay said, brushing his father’s comment off. “She’s not one to back down.”

“Hum.”

Jay knew that tone. He had heard it a thousand times during meetings, during business, at home… His father had a trick up his sleeve.

What are you planning? Jay thought, his eyes flickering for just a moment away from the race below to his father’s calculating face.

BANG!

Jay whipped his head back to the track. For a moment, he could only stare at the crash site, numb as it always made him to see such destruction…

Amy! His thoughts wrenched back to his Racer. She was in front of that crash, right? She wasn’t there…? He let out a soft sigh of relief as he quickly spotted her colors zoom across the finish line, her name announced over the speakers. She had made it. She was safe…

He frowned as she slowed to a stop. Glancing up to the screen above the window looking on the track, he noticed that the camera was trained on her. She was twisted in her seat, looking back over her shoulder at the crash. Jay suddenly realized that she had crossed the finish line looking back.

“And Racer Aims, who’s father had died in a crash similar, doesn’t seem like she can’t stop looking,” the commentator said, his tone not amused. “I can’t imagine what might be possibly going through her mind right now.”

That’s it! Jay realized suddenly, feeling his stomach form a tight knot. This is what dad was planning! She was in this race to prove to them that she could take what they threw at her. But this…

He couldn’t even think. It was a cruel mind trick! A physiological war game that they were pitting against Amy. They had just rattled her to the very core. Yes, she had advanced, yes she was unhurt… But the Sponsors just made their point to her. Her life was theirs and they could take it at any time. Perhaps not in the same race that killed her dad, but they could do it.

To kill other Racers in this race just proved that she wasn’t safe.

“And Racer Aims is out of the water and speeding off.”

Jay shook his head and turned his attention back below. Perhaps it shouldn’t be a surprise that Amy took off, using her signature program change to escape the track.

“Oh, no,” one of the Sponsors chuckled. “Seems to me that you’ve got a rouge Racer on your hands, Jay.”

“Seems so,” Jay said, forcing the smile on his face. “I should probably get after her. Excuse me.” He stood and made his way purposefully out of the box. However, once he was far enough away, his father caught his arm.

“Dad?” he asked, turning enough to see his father scowl.

“Stay away from Racer Aims,” his father warned.

“Uh,” Jay said, frowning. “How am I supposed to stay away from my own Racer?”

Ford scowled, his eyes boring into him. Jay held eye contact though. He wasn’t going to loose to his father. He was taught better than that by the selfsame man.

“Don’t get close to her,” his father sneered. “I know what you’ve been doing. Taking her out to clubs, picking her up for races and after class. Do yourself a favor, boy, and stay away from her.”

It was Jay’s turn to scowl. “Why would you care about who I’m close to?”

“For the love of…” Ford growled, finally letting go of his arm. “I’m trying to protect you, boy! That girl is an attention magnet and will draw others to her. The more people close to her, the more people close to you. It would only be a matter of time before someone noticed that you’re different.”

Jay stiffened. His Talent. A curse that both he and his father kept hidden. Oath Makers weren’t as widely accepted as other Talented. He once again thought of his mother, how she was an Oath Maker and her sudden death when he was only seven. Car crash, his father had said. He didn’t believe it. An Oath Maker was too much trouble to keep around. If the other Sponsors suspected it, his father would most likely been killed too.

And they’d murder him.

In that moment, Jay was torn. He wanted to go after Amy, wanted to give her the comfort she needed that he didn’t want anyone else to provide. However… He had spent most of his life keeping his Talent a secret, knowing what would happen if business men found out about his ‘unuseful’ Talent. Heck, he even kept the secret of other Talented, others who didn’t want anyone to know of their Talents for the fear of being discovered, dragged off, and hurt. It was a story he knew all too well.

They’re killing Talented, he had to remind himself, looking at his father’s concerned face. He’s part of it. The only reason he’s protecting you is because you’re his son. He doesn’t want anything to happen to you.

It felt as if his chest was being crushed. He wanted to protect Amy, he wanted to be there for her, but it was at the stake of his own safety. If those men in the Sponsor box found out about his Talent, he knew he wouldn’t live to see the next week.

His father must have seen the emotions rippling across his expression. His scowl deepened, his brown eyes narrowing. “Jason,” he said in a dropped whisper. “I’ll make you promise to stay away from her.”

Jay took in a small gasp through his nose. No. Not that. Anything but that! If he vowed to stay away from Amy, then how was he supposed to protect her? How was he supposed to keep his promise to her? He knew what it was like to be trapped between two vows that forced him to do the opposite of each other. It was painful, as if his very soul was being ripped in two. And it was. Keeping two different vows that contradicted each other would eventually kill him, as his Talent would force him to do both. The magic of his powers would lessen on the parties he had vowed with, breaking the magic on them and forcing that magic back on him. The only way out of that was for one of the parties of the vow released him from his promise. It wouldn’t matter if they broke the terms of their contract. They had to release him from the vow. Only then would the magic stop trying to kill him.

He couldn’t put himself in that situation again.

“Fine,” Jay said, looking away. “I’ll try to stay away from her.” It wasn’t quite the vow his father would be hoping for, because it wasn’t strong enough to engage his Talent, but it was the best Jay could do to satisfy his father and to keep his promise to Amy.

“Just try?” Ford asked, eyebrow raised.

“I’m her Sponsor,” Jay pointed out quietly. “Can’t always stay away.”

“True,” his father sighed. “Come on. Back inside. Tell one of your team to go after her. That’s what is expected.” Ford then snorted. Jay managed to sneak in a glare that his father didn’t see. There was nothing funny about this situation. “Quite unprofessional, your Racer Aims. Flying off after a race, especially one of this sort of… history with her. She should have at least stayed for interviews.”

It took all of Jay’s self control to not punch his father’s smug look and turning to run after Amy. However, he took several deep breaths, calming himself down, before he followed his father back into the Sponsor box, hating himself every step of the way.
*********
Jay’s dad has really surprised me as I’ve been writing this last NaNo. I want to hate him… He is a bad guy, but he’s also a father trying to protect his son. Ugh! I think he’s one of the most complicated characters I’ve ever written.

Anyway, next week you’ll meet Tyson. Still not sure what to do about him….

Enjoy the journey!

"Well, finally."

I am a terrible person.

I am so sorry for the long wait. I’ll explain after this post. To the story.
************
Jay knew to keep his distance in the next couple of weeks after the Race. He didn’t even need to have Sally to remind him to do so. Amy rarely was angry, but he knew he had struck some sort of nerve when she drove out of Hacker’s shop that night. He had never seen her so flustered and upset.

Maybe she’s right, he thought one night, as he once again wondered where he went wrong. If they want to kill her, they’d find a way. It was just… She needed to be careful! He didn’t even want to think about a world without her.

Geez, he thought. I really am in love with this girl. Not that he was going to tell her that. She’s made it clear that all she wants is a friend. And if that’s what she wanted, then so be it.

Sighing, he continued on with his evening. At least once a week he would visit Bluebird in the hospital. He was still the young man’s sponsor. Just because he couldn’t race didn’t mean that he shouldn’t still look after him.

Arriving to the hospital, he checked in at the front desk and made the familiar route up to the third floor where Bluebird was still in recovery. While it had been almost two months since the accident, there were complications with Bluebird’s recovery. It seemed that every time that he was going to be discharged from the hospital, something would go wrong. An infection, a wrong twist in physical therapy that landed him back in bed in pain, catching the flu. One thing after another kept him there.

And it was driving the poor Racer nuts.

Because of his status as a Racer, Bluebird got a room to himself, and in the two months being trapped in it, he had decorated it in a way that reminded Jay of a teenager’s room, with posters plastering the walls, junk on the floor, and leftovers on nearly every available space.

He’s still just a teenager, Jay reminded himself as he went into Bluebird’s room. He’s not even nineteen yet. Yet another reason why he didn’t like the Circuit. Why take such young kids in a dangerous situation?

Bluebird sat upright in his bed, his injured leg elevated by a contraption at the foot of his bed that kept it slung upward. His back was cushioned by a few pillows as he flipped through the channels on the TV. The poor kid was bored.

“Hey there,” Jay said, announcing himself. He no longer bothered to knock on Bluebird’s door. The Racer knew he was coming. “How’s the invalid today?”

Bluebird smirked at the insult. Unlike Amy, he liked being teased. “Still recovering from that last twist at therapy,” he grumbled, turning the TV off. “The doctors are saying that it might be another week before I can be back on my feet.”

“Sorry to hear that,” Jay said, knowing the young man’s frustrations. There were many people who liked being trapped inside. “When’s the next predicted date of you finally leaving this place?” He sat down in the chair next to Bluebird’s bed.

Bluebird shrugged. “They say another two weeks, which is going to translate into another month.”

Jay nodded sympathetically. It always seemed that it would take twice as long for him to get out. “At least you’ll be well fed by the time you leave.” Bluebird made a face, his opinion of being well fed. Jay chuckled, knowing why. Hospital food never tasted good.

“I want to get out of here so bad, Jay,” Bluebird said, glaring at his bound leg. “It shouldn’t take me this long to recover.”

The way Bluebird said it made Jay frown. “Shouldn’t take this long?” he repeated. “What do you mean by that?”

“Oh, come on, Jay,” Bluebird grumbled, thumping his head back against the wall. “I’m a Speeder. I’m supposed to be fast…”

“I know,” Jay sighed. “You don’t like being still…”

“No!” Bluebird snapped, closing his eyes tight. “I don’t mind being still… It’s not healing that I’m frustrated with!”

Jay frowned. “Healing?” he asked, confused. “You heal fast?”

“Yes,” Bluebird said exasperated. “All Speeders heal fast. I’m sure that Aims is the only Racer who doesn’t use her Talent to get over the cold faster. I haven’t been sicker for longer than a day in my life.” He then glared again at his leg. “Until this leg happened. Now I can’t seem to be able to use my Talent to fix it!”

Jay stared at Bluebird, feeling his chest constrict. Speeders could heal fast? But then why…

“They’re keeping you here,” he whispered, feeling his eyes grow wide with shock and understanding. “They don’t want you to leave.”

“Could have told you that the first week,” Bluebird huffed, still glaring at his foot. “Broke my arm once. Took me two days to fix it back up. My leg shouldn’t take this long.”

I’m a fool! Jay silently insulted himself. He should have known that all those consequences that kept Bluebird in the hospital weren’t accidents. The Circuit was trying to keep Bluebird in the hospital as long as possible.

But the question was why?

Bluebird wouldn’t be able to enter the Final this year, and they wouldn’t dare keep him in until after the start of the next season. He was a favorite. There would be questions if he didn’t start in the next season.

So why now? Why keep Bluebird in the hospital for as long as he has?

“Bluebird,” Jay said slowly, “Any ideas why you haven’t been able to leave? Why your leg hasn’t been healing as fast as you’d like?” It never hurt to ask the source of a problem about a possible answer.

“No idea,” Bluebird admitted. “They even say that they’re used to treating Speeders, but I feel like a normal person the way they keep treating me. Honestly, do they think that I can’t just trigger my Talent to make it down the hall without help?”

Jay said nothing, letting Bluebird to vent his frustrations. He only half listened as the young man went on and on. His mind was on what he had just realized. That there was something even more going on in this hospital than what met the eye.
*******
“You want me to what?”

Amy briefly looked up from her homework at Jay. It was early in the morning and she was content to do her homework in the quite of the dinning hall that the Racers used. There were few other Racers around, most didn’t like getting up in the morning. But she had class and she was always up and eating before most even thought about getting out of bed.

Jay, it seemed, knew this and had caught her while there wasn’t anyone there. It was the first Amy had seen him since the night after the last race. The next one was coming up soon and she hadn’t seen him at any of her training sessions. A good thing too. She was still mad at him. He was too concerned over her. He needed to back off.

“Sneak into a hospital and into their records,” he said, keeping his voice low. He sat across the table from her, seeming a bit fidgety.

“Why should I do that?” she whispered back, looking back down to her homework. There was a quiz today in one of her classes. She wanted to memorize as much as possible before she had to take it.

“Because I suspect that the Circuit has been doing something to Bluebird,” Jay explained. “They should be keeping records of it. If you could sneak in and take a peek at them…”

“No,” Amy snapped, glaring at him. “I’m not sneaking into a hospital to look at records. It’s illegal!”

“Oh?” he asked, his voice sounding strained. “And sneaking into a guarded building wasn’t?”

“I was listening in on a conversation that was plotting my death,” Amy argued. “I doubt that’s illegal. Now, looking into someone’s medical records… That’s illegal and I’m not having any part of it!”

“Amy!” he started to protest.

“No!” she snapped again. “I’m not doing it! Find another Racer to do your sneaking work. Or better yet, get Hacker to do it. He can hack into their computers, find the information you want, and hack his way back out without anyone knowing that he was there in the first place.”

“He’s tried already,” Jay grumbled. “But there’s nothing suspicious about their electronic records. Whatever they are doing, they’re keeping it on paper.”

“Why are you so worried about medical records now?” she asked, giving up on studying. There was no way that she would be able to concentrate enough on both memorizing and arguing with Jay at the same time.

“Because there is something wrong with Bluebird,” Jay explained. “He’s not healing as fast as he can. It’s upsetting him. And it worries me.”

Amy glared at him. She could already hear it in his tone. He was worried that whatever was happening to Bluebird might happen to her. He was being overprotective again.

“My answer is still no,” she said again. “I’m a chemistry student, Jay. I’ve talked with older students about the classes I’m going to be taking. They’ve told me that some of my classes are going to deal with medical cases. And when that happens, we have to sign an agreement to not reveal anything about those cases. I’m not going to get in trouble my first year of college by looking into medical records. They won’t let me into those classes if I have a charge of medical snooping on my plate. I’m sorry. I’m not doing it. My classes are more important.”

Jay opened his mouth to say something then sighed, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “You really won’t do it, will you?”

“You got that right,” she huffed. She started putting her books into her bag. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have class to attend.”

“Alright,” he sighed, standing up. “I’ll be at Hacker’s shop this afternoon. The next Race is just a couple weeks away. I’ll know what type of Race it is today. Then we can focus on that. Goodbye, Aims.”

He walked away, his posture speaking of defeat. Amy just snorted and finished putting her things up. Deserves him right, asking her to do something illegal. He should know better than that.

But as she started for class, she was bothered by something else. It wasn’t until Maxx spoke did she realize that he had noticed.

“So…” Maxx said as he drove to class. Once again, she had pulled out her notes to try to prepare for the quiz. Maxx was more than fine to drive her to class. “What did Jay want? Neither of you seem happy at this point.”

“Him just being an idiot,” she replied, not really wanting to get into it. “That’s all.”

“Really?” Maxx asked, unconvinced. “Are you two arguing again? To be honest, it’s very frustrating for the rest of us.”

She paused then glanced up to Maxx’s dashboard. “Frustrating for the rest of you?” she asked.

“Yes,” Maxx said matter-of-factly. “Hacker, Sally, myself. Whatever is getting between you and Jay is making things awkward for the rest of us.”

“How can it be awkward?” she asked, feeling frustrated again. First Jay, and now Maxx arguing with her? Couldn’t they wait until after her quiz? “Jay and I haven’t been in the same room for weeks.”

“Exactly!” Maxx pointed out. “Jay is Hacker’s employer. Sally is Hacker’s girlfriend. We are employed by Jay. He’s the boss and they haven’t seen him because he’s been keeping his distance from you. It’s all very frustrating.”

“I’m sorry that Jay hasn’t been hanging around,” she snapped. “Like I have so much control over the man!”

“You do have control over him!” Maxx snapped back. “The guy likes you, for crying out loud! You could be a little nicer to him!”

Amy felt her face flush with embarrassment. “He doesn’t like me!”

“Oh, yes he does,” Maxx huffed. “I’m a computer chip in your head and even I know it. Just make up with him about whatever you’re arguing about and let the rest of us get on with our lives!”

“Maxx,” she said, feeling her face get redder. “Shut up.”

“Shutting me up won’t kill the truth,” Maxx grumbled.

“I need to study.”

“You know the material.”

“Just…” She grunted in frustration. “Just… Shut up!”

“Fine,” Maxx said. “I won’t say anything until you apologize to Jay.”

“I give you an hour before you break that promise.”

Maxx didn’t say anything. Huffing, Amy once again tried to study, trying to push all her troubles away until after her quiz.
**********
Maxx actually kept true to his word. Amy was glad for the silence in her head as she concentrated on her quiz, but afterwards… It was odd to have thoughts that weren’t interrupted.

“Maxx,” she said, getting into him after class. “Are you really going to not speak to me until I apologize to Jay?”

He said nothing.

“Maxx,” she moaned, patting his dashboard. “Please?”

His only response was to start his engine and start driving to Hacker’s shop. Amy sighed, letting him drive. What did she have to apologize for? It was Jay’s fault anyway. He should know better than to ask her to do something illegal. There was no way that she was going to do that!

Arriving to the shop, Hacker and Sally were already there. Sally was always there, since her school was closer to his shop than the Academy. It also helped that Hacker was always picking her up. The two of them were cuddled in front of one of the computers, gazing at each other instead of the screen. Amy wouldn’t be surprised if she caught them making out one of these days.

“Hello!” she sighed as she got out of Maxx. “Anything new I should know about?”

“Oh!” Sally said, turning as she realized that someone had arrived. “Amy! When did you get here?”

“Just now,” Amy said, holding in another sigh. These two were just so in love that it was sickening. “I thought Jay was going to be here.”

“He’ll be here in a minute,” Hacker said, getting up. He walked over to Maxx, patting his hood. “And how is our favorite program?”

Maxx didn’t even respond to that!

“Maxx?” Hacker asked slowly, switching his gaze between the car and her.

She couldn’t hold in her sigh. “Maxx is mad at me,” she admitted. “He’s refusing to talk to me until I apologize.”

“You are stubborn as a mule,” Sally noted, still sitting by the computer. “It takes extreme measures to get you to change your mind.”

Amy glared at her friend, only getting a grin in return.

The garage door was still open as a motorcycle drove in. Amy frowned at the newcomer until he took off his helmet.

“Jay,” Hacker said, sounding surprised. “When did you get a motorcycle?”

“When the weather started getting better,” Jay said, smiling. Despite the argument they had earlier, he seemed chipper. Perhaps that would be enough to make Maxx talk again. Jay obviously didn’t have a problem anymore. “I always wanted a motorcycle.”

“And you’re now just getting one?” Amy asked, unconvinced.

He grinned. “Why not?”

Amy groaned, letting the issue drop.

“How is everyone?” he asked, placing the kickstand in place as he got off the bike.

“Good, for the most part,” Hacker answered. “But it seems that Maxx is angry and is refusing to talk.”

Jay raised an eyebrow.

“He’s mad at me,” Amy clarified. “I’ll fix it.” Eventually.

“Better do it soon,” Jay pointed out. “The next Race is in two weeks. It’s the semifinals. You’ll need to get into the top three to get into the Finals.”

“I know that,” Amy grumbled. “Believe me I know.”

“What type of Race is it?” Sally asked.

Jay finally flinched. “Jet skis.”

Amy froze, feeling numbness. Jet skis. The way her father died.
***********
It was nice to be back in the shop, enjoying the company of his friends. However, it was very strange to have Maxx and Amy not chip in on the conversation. Why Maxx was mad, Jay couldn’t figure out. He had never been mad before. But Amy was sure that she could fix it. It was Amy not talking that he could understand.

The meeting to announce the next Race was still fresh in his mind. The Sponsors were all gathered, either in person or by video, as the Circuit spokesperson announced the next Race. The same chill was still in him as when he heard that it was going to be on jet skis. And he knew immediately why they had picked that Race for the semifinals.

They were trying to physic Amy out, scare her enough so that she wouldn’t get into the finals.

They’re cruel people, he thought bitterly, trying unsuccessfully to get Amy to talk. They knew what this type of Race would do to her. He could see just what it was doing to her now. Her face was pale, her arms held tightly around herself, the look of fear in her eyes. It was terrible to see in her.

She’s… still a kid, Jay thought, realizing that her nineteenth birthday was only a month away. All she can probably see is her dad dying.

Unable to take it, he quietly approached Hacker when Sally was away using the bathroom. “Hey,” he said, squatting down to talk to the young man under the car, “do you mind if Amy and I head out for a bit?”

“Want to talk to her alone?” Hacker figured out quickly.

“She’s upset,” Jay pointed out. “Perhaps a quiet talk elsewhere will calm her down.”

“Alright,” Hacker answered from underneath Maxx. “I’ll tell Sally that the two of you went out on a spin on your new bike.”

“Thank you,” Jay said, smiling. Hacker was shaper than he would have thought about things like relationships.

Walking over to Amy, he once again couldn’t help but notice her fear. She sat on the couch, curled into a ball.

“Hey,” he said, getting her attention. She only flickered her eyes up at him. “Do you want to go for a ride?”

“Maxx is being worked on,” she said softly, the first words she said since he revealed the type of Race. Her eyes flickered to her car, worry in her expression.

“No,” he said, forcing himself to be cheerful, “I mean on my bike. Let some other human drive for you.”

She looked back up at him, finally showing a bit of confusion instead of fear.

“It’ll be fun,” he said, holding his hand out to her. “Let’s go.”

Hesitantly, she got up, ignoring his hand as usual. He took that as a good sign and picked out one of the extra helmets that Hacker had lying around the shop and gave it to her. She put it on, visor down so that the fear in her face was finally covered. Putting his own helmet on, he got on his bike. Amy climbed on behind him, wrapping her arms around his chest to stabilize herself.

Bringing the engine to life, he waved goodbye to Hacker and Sally who had just appeared. Amy got in a small wave before he drove out of the shop. He joined the traffic outside, enjoying the thrill of driving. Is this what Amy enjoyed all the time?

“Where are we going?” Amy asked, her voice muffled by the helmet and drowned by the whistling wind.

“I thought about going to a park,” he answered. “We need to talk.”

She fell again into silence. Jay was fine with that. He needed to gather his thoughts as well. He drove to the outskirts of the city, to the same park that he and Amy went to after they learned that the Sponsors wanted to kill her. It was late afternoon and the park was emptying as families were going home to enjoy dinner. He drove around the park for a bit before coming to an empty playground. He had decided against the same hill that overlooked the city that they had first gone to. He didn’t need to remind her of the dangers she faced in the Circuit.

“Nice ride,” Amy said as they got off. She took off the helmet with an expert flip, now very used to wearing one. “I wonder why it took you so long to get one.”

He shrugged, putting his helmet down. “I’ve always had other things to get and do. I just finally decided to get one this week.” It wasn’t a lie. Although he could always afford a motorcycle, he just had never found the time to get one. Perhaps he was feeling sorry for himself this week and decided to finally indulge in himself, but he did finally get one.

“What do you want to talk about?” she asked, once again folding her arms around herself. Although it was a bit nippy, he knew her gesture was more to her fear than the weather.

“Well,” he said, walking over to the playground. “First of all, I need to apologize for this morning.” He shook his head. “I shouldn’t have asked you to do that. It’s illegal and you were right to refuse.” Before the meeting, he had a lot of time to think about what she had said that morning. And she was right. If he was going to save the Talented, he had better learn to do it legally so that he wouldn’t get in trouble later on.

“Thank you,” Amy said, sounding relieved.

“Second,” he said, coming to the swings and sitting down in one. Amy followed suit, gently swinging with her arms still wrapped around herself. “We need to talk about the next Race.”

She said nothing, biting her lower lip.

“It’s upsetting you,” he pointed out. “You can’t let this control you, Amy. You need to go to this Race if you’re going to get to the Finals.”

“I know that,” she whimpered. “But… Can’t I just…” She stopped talking, bowing her head. “It’s the Race that killed my Dad, Jay. How am I supposed to react?”

“By proving to the Sponsors that they can’t scare you,” he said immediately. “By going into this Race with your head held high and no fear in your eyes.”

She glanced at him. He smiled, what he always did when he felt his own fear trying to take him. It was the only way he knew how to fight fear. Smile in defiance, smile to prove that he was going to move forward anyway, a smile to prove to himself that he can do it.

“How can you still smile?” she asked softly, looking at him with a confused sort of hurt. “My life is in danger and you’re smiling?”

He forced himself to continue to smile, though her remark did hurt. Her life was in danger. “Because I promised to get you through this,” he said, softening his smile just a bit. “And I’ll do it, even if it means smiling for your sake.” His grin widened. “Especially for your sake.”

She snorted. “You’ve been overprotective lately.”

Ah, the truth. He had wondered why she was upset at him. He knew that she had been upset, he just didn’t know why.

It comes again to our relationship, he thought. She just wants a friend and I keep acting like I want something more. But he couldn’t fool himself. He did want more. He wanted her to see him more than just a friend. Perhaps his overprotectiveness came across to her as him manifesting his feelings towards her. And in part, his actions did stem from his feelings for her, but his promise did even more.

“My Talent is triggered to protect you, Amy,” he pointed out, hoping that it would be enough to convince her. “I promised to protect you.”

“You promised to help me survive the Circuit,” she grumbled. He barely managed to hide his flinch. She almost had a point.

“Aren’t they the same?” he asked.

She glanced at him, frowning. “I guess,” she muttered reluctantly.

“I’m trying to help, Amy,” he said softly. He wanted to reach out and hold her hand, but he kept back. That would be the wrong gesture right now. “But you need to let me help.”

She sighed, scuffing her feet in the dirt beneath her swing. “I’m sorry,” she said softly. “I guess I have been pushing you away the last couple of days.”

He didn’t have to force his smile this time.
*******
“Well, finally,” Maxx said, stunning Hacker and Sally.

“Maxx?” Hacker asked, rolling out from beneath him and frowning at the car. “Started talking again?”

“Amy finally did as I suggested,” Maxx explained. “Now, get back to work. I’ll need to be in top shape for our next Race.”
*********
I apologize once again for the hideously long wait and cannot even beg for your forgiveness on how terrible it was. March until now…? I am a terrible human being. But there were a couple of factors that led to this disastrously long hiatus.

1) I realized this story had a glaringly horrible plot problem. The races themselves. The way I had the scoring/winning system set up for this story was completely ridiculous and unrealistic. I mean, really. Only the top three (or whatever number I came up with) could advance? Might as well just have one race and get it all over with. I’ve talked with a few friends about this and I am currently redoing the racing system. It’ll be a while to fix, since it is a major part of the entire book, but I’m working on it. For the time being, from now on out, the system is different (I’m thinking Racecar scoring system) and will continue on in that direction. I’ll go back and eventually fix this problem in earlier posts, but it will take some time. I will go forward, however with the new system.

2) Depression sucks. No, literally, it sucks. It sucks everything joyful out of a lot of things I used to enjoy. And that sadly also included writing. It didn’t help that once I realized the previously noticed plot problem that it fed into my depression and I couldn’t find much motivation to write. I’ve come to accept that I will have to fight this depression for the rest of my life and I have taken steps towards that end. On that cheerful note, I’ve started biking again and I can tell the difference between when I’ve biked and when I haven’t. This winter is going to be long without biking. But for now, realize that this is something I’m working on and have finally (finally!) started making good progress.

3) Fan Fiction. Once I started feeling better with the biking I’ve been doing, I started finding some little joys in reading again and my little brother kind of, accidentally, introduced me to fan fiction. While previously, I had no real opinion on fan fiction (except maybe thinking that some people are unoriginal for using characters not of their own); I’ve come to respect this aspect of writing. There is some really good fan fiction out there and I’m amazed at the talent these people have to be able to capture a beloved character and make them even more amazing. And before you ask, well… yes. I did write some fan fiction of my own, to get me back into the joys of writing. It is harder than it looks and I think I might actually have improved my writing a bit. And no. I will not be sharing this fan fiction, so don’t even ask.

So now you know why there has been no posts for nearly ten months. I know they seem like pathetic excuses, but that is what happened. I feel terrible for making my few readers wait for such a long time as I started stitching my life back together, but I thank you for waiting and not pressuring me. Now that I’m feeling more stable, a bit of gentle pressure would be nice and encouraging. I really want Racer to work; I honestly feel that it’ll be a novel I can successfully sell to a publisher. While it might not have the same drive I had with Martin (how could it? Martin was in my head for ten years), Racer has something special if I let it. Any encouragement I get can help.

Thank you again for being so patient and enduring. If I can make just a few people happy with my stories, then I’ve done some good.

Enjoy the journey!